Bentley’s official site
11-15 Swallow Street, London, W1B 4DGT +44 (0)20 7734 4756
Six oysters plus glass £9.95
How long does it take to shuck open twelve oysters? Forty-five minutes at Bentley’s – maybe there’s mythical preparatory work involved, but I was completely baffled on this visit. Note, this is not a review.
Service, absent.
Let me introduce you to bartender Tim.
Tim looks like an intelligent and strapping young master, except he’s a lot more interested in chatting with the offshore bank accountant who is sitting at the far end of the bar from me, than actually serving me.
“18 pence per share, FTSE 100 company, I’m not kidding” says Timmyboy.
“eh?” I was thinking more along the lines of £10 half dozen oysters and a glass of wine. Turns out he’s not talking to me, even though he chose to pop a wine bottle in my face and shout across the bar (but to my face) to the silver hair gentlemen who can’t seem to stop announcing to the room that he is in fact, an offshore bank accountant.
Ok let’s try that again. Five minutes of trying to establish eye contact with Mr Stockbroker behind the bar later…
“Hi there, can I get your oysters please?” says me.
“Garble garble garble…. 18pence, went up to 36p last month, I kid you not.” says Tim.
Me: “Oysters, please”
Him: “Right. Oysters. That’s it?”
Me: “What else do you recommend?”
Tim: “Garble garble. I think it’s up to 59p last I checked.”
Me: “….”
Then, he walks toward the gentlemen and reaches his perfectly cropped head toward the man’s ear, as if he was whispering sweet nothings to Diane Kruger. I attempt to re-establish eye contact with Timilicious, perusing time-honoured headbobbing techniques until our eyes snap in contact with one another and he finally walks toward me. (this is a short bar, no more than 3 meters in length)
Him: “Yes, what can I get you?”
Me: “The half dozen plus a glass of white, what wine would you recommend?”
Him: “Its all good.”
Before I had the chance to point to something on the winelist, Mr offshore bank accountant decides to announce to the world that he’s leaving. No surprise, Tim leaves me hanging and rushes to his highness to usher him out the door. He cannot hide his enthusiasm and stretches his hand out and introduces himself “Tim! I’m here all week next week, come back again and we’ll chat more.”
Gosh, what excellent service, now why didn’t I become an offshore bank accountant I wonder.
From start to finish, its about half an hour, and only then did he bother to pour us our glasses of wine.
Him: “This is Spanish, O.K.?”
And he disappears into the next room, never to be seen again. I was so glad when the manageress tapped on me to let me know there was a table in the outside area, I ran out.
Did I mention a £2 cover charge plus 12.5% (non) service?
Appalling.
Seriously, how long?
By the time they brought out our glasses of white which were still sitting on the bar, the cool crispness had become a warm vinegar. Another five minutes pass, I had to gently remind them to bring out our bread, to which the waiter replied: “Oh, we knew that. We were just heating up new ones, just in case it went stale”
Ha.ha.ha.
Forty five minutes into this sitting, our oysters finally appear.
Ok. So here’s the good thing, the oysters were excellent. In fact, they were so good, they might possibly have been the best I’ve ever eaten in London, so far. They were mineral and refreshing, the texture was so creamy that one need not have to hold his breathe to eat them. There werent any strong aftertastes or offensive fishiness.
A squige of lemon here, a splash of shallots vinegar there; Sizzling acidity which went down so smooth, I was inclined to believe that these oysters had true aphrodisiac powers. Oh yummy. Similarly, the bread was top notch – the brown ones appear to be a kind of oat bread, with a sweetish floury flavour and chocolatey aroma.
Right then, slurp, slurp, slurp. That’s twelve oysters and two glasses done. 4pm, time to go. I walked in at 3. The bill takes, oh just about 20 minutes to get to me. And we find that they’ve charged an additional £6 for non-existent cherry clams. Very creative, we send it back. Another 15 minutes later, the real bill reappears. Finally.
Maybe next time, not.
In the end, we refused the ‘discretionary’ 12.5%, this was the first time I’ve ever done this, as I really felt it was undeserved. Service was dismissive and disrespectful. What was suppose to be a quick oyster slurping session on a sunny Sunday afternoon, turned into abit of a nightmare. There was still the mandatory £2 cover charge per person – that’s four quid, for what? Dodgy stock putting advice from a wannabe broker? Wrong side of the bar and wrong profession altogether.
18p per share anyone?
Carelessness I can forgive, especially if the staff are indeed trying and if the food is up to scratch. Yes, the Bentley’s £10 deal for 6 delicious oysters and a glass of pretty able bodied wine is indeed a very good deal. So much so, I’d go as far as to say that they were worth the 45 minute wait. But having to endure the most egotistical of arrogant barman (I complain about poor bartending, because I’ve worked behind bars before) ever to grace restaurant bars; utterly infuriating.
Perhaps this was just bad luck, an off day and maybe you guys have had better visits, I would really like to believe that, hence the non-review.
If you are reading this Mr Corrigan, I respect you and your work, but seriously take a deeper look into the front of house at Bentley’s.
follow the tweets
Jonathan
Sorry you had a duff experience. We did too. My dover sole was overcooked and a mussel starter featured hardly any mussels at all. We were very disappointed, despite individual elements of the meal being very high class.
http://aroundbritainwithapaunch.blogspot.com/2009/02/disappointing-bentleys.html
Jonathan’s last blog post..Harwood Arms, Fulham
June 3, 2009 at 9:03 am
Kavey
Hmmm, I’d been thinking of visiting this place having been in audience for Market Kitchen recently when Corrigan was a guest chef. When I’m paying for a meal out I expect good food AND good service, so I’m rethinking.
I’ve insisted that service be removed on a few occasions. Not often but certainly several times in last few years.
Kavey’s last blog post..Hello and thanks for all the fish!
June 3, 2009 at 10:03 am
Helen
Oh no, what a nightmare! I adore oysters and any delay in getting my hands on them would wind me up, let alone having to wait 45 minutes! I did think you might have had to satisfy a lobster craving though?
Helen’s last blog post..Belgo Lobsterfest
June 3, 2009 at 12:26 pm
The Duo Dishes
A bad meal experience can definitely ruin a meal. We do love oysters though, and it looks like they were tasty.
The Duo Dishes’s last blog post..What To Do With This?
June 3, 2009 at 5:50 pm
Archerfiah.org
delicious
Archerfiah.org’s last blog post..ISSF World Cup Shotgun · Minsk, BLR Schedule
June 4, 2009 at 7:33 am
Helen Yuet Ling Pang
What a horrible experience. I wonder if I would have stayed so long?
Helen Yuet Ling Pang’s last blog post..Tsuru (Japanese) – London, England (7.5/10)
June 4, 2009 at 10:09 am
Lainie Petersen
Terrible story: Bad service is horrid, but to then give you the wrong bill?
Lainie Petersen’s last blog post..auraTeas’ Formosa Shanlinxi High Mountain Oolong (review)
June 5, 2009 at 7:06 am
Kang L.
Jonathan – That’s quite disheartening, there are some glowing reviews around and I would have thought that they would at least put out high quality meals, but I guess its not the case. Perhaps Richard Corrigan needs to step in to shake things up alittle.
Kavey- Personally, I will not return to Bentley’s, I really felt disrespected, and its a really sinking feeling especially. The Bentley’s staff culture is one which screams snobbery and pretension, and that can only be a negative thing.
H.Gravy – hehehehe… dammit you keep reminding me about the lobsterfest!!! I will make a trip to Belgo soon enough, lobster salad here i come!
The Duo Dishes – Indeed! Great oysters, yes… but the service just left a bad taste.
H.worldfoodie – Horrible indeed!
Lainie – Exactly! and we had to wait so long for them to produce the wrong bill, one thing is for sure, I am not heading back to bentleys again.
June 5, 2009 at 9:39 am
Krista
Why is this not a review? Seems like a review to me!
Krista’s last blog post..The Wine & Spirits Level 2 Exam
June 6, 2009 at 11:13 am
Heavensent
What a shame you had such a disappointing time at Bentley’s. I have been many times and experienced good food and good service. The oysters are fantastic, so it really is worth going and finding out for yourself, because the £10 deal is a bargin. I think it is unfair that Kang has chosen to name the barman in question, because if Richard Corigan reads this opinion then he would without a doubt dismiss him. We have every right to expect good service given the 12.5% service charge and the cover charge of £2, but we do not have the right jeopardise someone’s job and humiliate them. He didn’t make you feel as important as the offshore banker so you have decided to attack him via your blog, well lets just hope that he keeps his job and doesn’t get sacked and sue you for defamation of character. Or lets just hope he doesn’t have a family to support.
June 22, 2009 at 7:06 pm
Kang L.
Heavensent,
It is not in my interest to get anyone sacked, and I do not believe that I am putting anybody’s job at jeopardy. I would be very surprised if he gets the sack on the back of one bad review. And besides, there could be several Tims working in the same restaurant, I did not name and shame anyone, besides, Tim could even be a pseudonym, the point is, there is no naming and shaming going on here. I am merely reporting on the bad experience.
I think we need to give Richard Corrigan abit more credit than that, if he reads this review, he will look at it – intelligently – and decide on how to improve the service. As I said in my write-up, I expect Mr Corrigan and the staff at Bentley’s to look into improving service.
Look, as a restaurant reviewer, it is my role to report on my experience. I try to fully disclose and be as objective as I can about what I say. If I was the restaurant owner, I would look at the negative feedback and take it constructively to improve. In this case, the service was not good, hence, I expect the restaurant to look at this write-up so as to improve service.
All I am doing is providing my honest opinion about my experience at the restaurants. I am not attacking anyone. I am reporting what happen. Besides, I did not mention time/date I was there, didnt even know the person’s last name, but what I do know is that I was served badly, and I am merely writing up on that experience. There is nothing wrong with that, and that is the objective and the heart of a restaurant review. That’s what makes restaurant reviews useful, because it gives the public an insight into what an experience at the restaurant is going to be like. Read some of my other reviews, if the experience was good, I say it was good. In this case, its not good, so I say its not good. From the restaurant’s perspective, it is a way for them to get feedback into what/how to improve their restaurant.
I hardly believe they will use one bad review and try and sue someone for it. What does that say about our society then, if I have not the freedom to talk about my experiences at the restaurant freely?
Let’s spin it around shall we, if you were Richard Corrigan, and you read one bad review about your restaurant, what would you do? Would you go straight ahead and sack your staff? Or would you talk to them and look into ways of improving service?
I would hope that you would choose the latter.
June 22, 2009 at 7:23 pm
catty
I disagree with Heavensent – if one of my staff (and because I’m so successful I have a staff of manymany
) were not performing, I would definitely want to know what they were doing during the precious minutes that I am paying them and I would want to know who was the offender. As per Kang’s response, I wouldn’t fire them (that’s a little harsh) but bring to light that this has brought negative publicity (though all publicity is good publicity) to the restaurant.
Sad that you had a bad time Kang, but the oysters are good aren’t they!!
catty’s last blog post..sleeping and eating, the virtues of (sunday) living
June 22, 2009 at 8:11 pm
Carpy
I have to note that my experience at Bentleys in January this year was fantastic – it was my birthday and the service and food (I also sat at the bar) could not have been better. The staff were, in fact, so good that I commented as much to Mr Corrigan (who was at the restaurant at the time) on my way out.
June 24, 2009 at 3:44 pm